Fwd: Parshas Va'eschanan: Mirrors, Mitzvos, and Unshakeable Self-Worth

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From: Mendy & Chaim | GYE <newsletter@chizuk.guardyoureyes.com>
Date: Fri, Aug 16, 2024 at 6:35 PM
Subject: Parshas Va'eschanan: Mirrors, Mitzvos, and Unshakeable Self-Worth
To: <lakinkfirkfir@gmail.com>

Dear Chaveirim, As we emerge from 3 Weeks & Tisha B'Av, this week's newsletter focuses on a theme that can speed up and transform journey to freedom: recognizing and embracing our innate worth and strength. Inside, you'll find: 🎉 A heartwarming celebration of triumph: @Chaimoigen shares his incredible journey to 365 days of purity. 📜 Timeless wisdom from our sages: Lessons from Rabbi Yishmael's children on maintaining a sense of "chashivus" in the face of temptation. 🪞 Practical advice for daily growth: @HashemHelpMe offers a simple yet powerful exercise to boost self-worth. Each of these stories and insights reminds us that we are more than our struggles. We are beloved children of Hashem, each with a unique purpose and inherent value. Wishing you continued success on your path, Mendy & Chaim 365 Days Clean: A Journey of Hope and Gratitude By @Chaimoigen Tonight is a special night, my sweetest friends. I am celebrating 365 days free of any inappropriate viewing whatsoever. (Including limiting of internet use to only targeted pre-determined searches and thereby avoiding seeing almost any pritzus). This incredible accomplishment is one that I did not know that I would ever achieve. It fills me with thankfulness and awe, with joy and a sense of quietude in the center of my being. I am humbled to have reached this point. הודו לה' כי טוב כי לעולם חסדו, כי יעמוד לימין אביון להושיעו משופטי נפשו. I had planned on writing something significant to mark this milestone. Unfortunately, the Rebono Shel Olam saw fit to present me with a significant challenge these past few days, and I don't have the energy for the kind of post that I had envisioned writing tonight. But this I know: There is hope. There are no dead ends. Life, in the Hands of the Aibeshter, is worth living and can ever be found to be full of Chaim. Good Chaverim are the key to learning how to live. So, as I face today's challenge, I have hope. And I have Bitachon. אי"ה כשם שעד הנה יעזרונו חסדיך ורחמיך, כן אל תטשינו ה' אלקינו לנצח. I know that although life will necessarily ever be a series of Nisyonos, חיים ברצונו (life according to His will) is possible and makes it worthwhile. And I have undying gratitude to you, my close friends. Because you have helped me become who I have always wanted to be. I have learned so much from all of you. I am hoping and planning to keep growing now, im yirtzeh Hashem, and climbing higher. And I will stay close, let's keep climbing together, with Hashem's help. Thank you Hashem, and thank you GYE. Royalty in Chains: What Rabbi Yishmael's Children Teach Us About Inner Strength As we emerge from the solemn day of Tisha B'Av, let's reflect on a powerful story from Gittin 58a, also recounted in Kinah #23 ("ואת נווי חטאתי"). This tale teaches us about maintaining our dignity and sense of self even in the darkest times. Rav Yehuda relates in the name of Rav: The son and daughter of Rabbi Yishmael ben Elisha the High Priest were captured and sold into slavery to different masters. These masters, marveling at their captives' beauty, decided to arrange a marriage between them, hoping to profit from their offspring. Unaware of their relationship, the siblings were placed in a room together. The son, sitting in one corner, declared, "I am a Kohen, descended from High Priests. How can I marry a slave?" From the other corner, his sister echoed, "I am the daughter of a Kohen, descended from High Priests. How can I be wed to a slave?" They wept through the night, only to recognize each other at dawn. In that moment of realization, they embraced and wept so bitterly that their souls departed. This poignant story illustrates a profound lesson: our sense of self-worth and identity can sustain us even in the face of overwhelming adversity. In the words of R' Shlomie Zimmerman, in his book "From Boys to Men": "Gedolim across the spectrum from Litvish to Chassidish, emphasize that a critical part of Yiddishkeit, and the best general shemirah from aveirah, is feeling good about oneself through a deep sense of one's innate chashivus (See Sichos Mussar of R' Chaim Shmulevitz Ch. 28). Recognizing the truth of one's essence—that you are a beautiful, worthy, beloved, tzelem Elokim—is the foundation of Yiddishkeit and healthy living. It is crucial to remember the absolute truth: that even with all of one's challenges, shortcomings, and aveiros, he is inherently holy, a pure neshamah, and remains beloved by Hashem. "To the degree that one recognizes the fundamental truth of his innate and incredible chashivus, one will avoid things which distance him from his true essence (aveiros and negativity) and pursue things that are innately positive and good (mitzvos and maasim tovim). Mitzvos and positive living will then produce a feeling of being "in sync" with his true atzmiyus (self), while aveiros and negativity will feel foreign and beneath him." As we move forward from Tisha B'Av, let's internalize these teachings: Strive to see yourself as someone who is above inappropriate behaviors. Even if you stumble, remember that it doesn't reflect your true self. Instead of dwelling on failures, focus on your potential for greatness. Understand that your worth isn't dependent on external circumstances, but on your essence as a divine soul, and like in the story a prestigious member of Hashem's ממלכת כהנים. Remember, GYE warriors, you are more precious and capable than you realize. Let's continue this journey together, one day at a time, always striving to align our actions with our true, elevated selves. A Mirror Exercise for Boosting Self-Worth @HashemHelpMe shared this exercise with a member struggling with self-worth issues (and who among us doesn't sometimes?). It's designed to help train yourself to maintain the right mindset: Once a day, stand in front of a mirror. Focus deeply on the eyes looking back at you. Tell that fellow in the mirror: "Hey, you are a really great fellow! You daven, you learn, you do many mitzvos, and you have the courage to deal with a tough challenge that most guys have but unfortunately can't face. Hashem will help you win. Stop defining yourself as a rasha and loser. You started this habit way back, without the knowledge of how bad it is. Have a great day!" Do this until you start believing it - because it is the truth, buddy. Remember, you're not just struggling; you're actively working to improve. That alone is a tremendous accomplishment. Keep at it, and may Hashem give you the strength to overcome this challenge.